2025.02.17 i need to play touys

2025.02.17 i've been so lazy about it but finallyyyy finished all my long answer work for my meterology examinations. it's been good to go through regardless but i find it difficult to judge how i should be spending my time efficiently. theres a bit of push and pull because i feel like i have a good understanding but because i'm not neurotic about it i feel that i could always do more, thus driving the cycle of anxiety forward. maybe my mind and emotions are much the same as storm systems.

2025.02.26 keep getting myself worked up over things and then rationalising and solving my problem. and then i just have all that energy created in that process for nothing

2025.02.22 i feel devoid of all desires and emotions; i exist merely as a vessel. i sleep but i am unable to rest. this feeling comes to pass in time.

2025.02.19 okay well i guess the reason meterology is beating my ass is because they combined both levels of qualification into one course and then condensed the time to 1 month even though we're all entry level.... speechless. i worked on my notes for 8 hours yesterday and still couldn't catch up to where i needed to be. but i also finally feel things click and understand the basics enough that the future isn't completely bleak. i feel alright but i also took my blood pressure this morning and it was crazy high so lol

2025.02.19 https://soundcloud.com/fgrsktr/miya i might actually have to get back to the gym

2025.02.16 i'm obsessed with the game chocolatier

2025.02.15 meteorology is dominating me right now https://modis.gsfc.nasa.gov/gallery/

2025.02.15 it's hard to find a middle ground for small updates and i need to leave social media asap again sooo. here we are. serving as temporary journal while i work on that project at my leisure.